I have work to do so naturally I'm writing a blog post right now.
Today was just epically frustrating. My knee is kind of screwed up right now, which is a big part of all my frustrations. And I'm having alignment issues, and my modern teacher singled me out after class today to talk about them. Which, I guess, is a good thing. It's common knowledge in dance that teachers will, not really "pick their favorites" but will see potential in certain dancers and then focus more energy on said dancers than others. If that last sentence didn't make sense, please be reassured that I don't give a crap.
So sometimes when you keep getting a lot of corrections in class it's easy to feel like "I can't do ANYTHING right today!" but it's mentally healthier (and pretty much true) to think "At least getting all these corrections means the teacher likes me, and is paying attention to me."
So I'm trying to look at it that way. But it's still pissing me off. I've had some issues with alignment ever since I had to take so much time off of dance for my injuries. But alignment is one of the most difficult things to fix. It's strictly structural and I, quite frankly, FRIGGING HATE IT.
I have to go to class now, but I'm hoping things get better in ballet.
Which is not likely. Because I hate ballet. Ballet also makes my knee hurt more. FML.
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Sometimes you just don't have a leg to stand on
Around this time two years ago I was thrown a curve-ball that drastically affected my entire life.
I was dancing in the studio in my basement, like I do almost everyday when I'm home, so it was absolutely a normal day. I even remember what I was dancing to: Oculus Ex Inferni by Symphony X. I went to do a double attitude jump and as I was coming back down to land it I caught all of my weight on the side of my foot.
This was the first in a series of injuries that gradually screwed up my ankle for good. I was out of dance for about two months and quite frankly I probably should have been out for longer, but I am stupid, so the first second it didn't absolutely kill to relevé I was dancing again.
I am an idiot.
Because of that decision I was back doing risky jumps and turns way before I should have. After I had been dancing again for only a few months in March when I supinated my same ankle while walking. At first I thought I had broken my ankle because I heard a super loud cracking sound, but I later learned that ligaments tend to make a loud cracking noise when they tear apart.
That particular injury took a couple of months to heal. For a while I wasn't even sure if I would be able to attend the dance intensive at Ballet Chicago that summer that I had auditioned into. Luckily I felt strong enough several weeks before the 5 week long intensive started and decided to go. (That's how I initially found out about Columbia!) When I came back at the end of the summer I felt stronger than I'd been in months and I was excited to start my junior year.
However, it was apparently inevitable that I would get injured again. That December I was at a show for my best friend's band in Columbus when I was knocked over in a mosh pit. Again I supinated my bad ankle, but rather than get trampled my the mosh pit, I jumped right back up. I could tell I'd hurt my ankle again, but the combination of adrenaline and my heightened pain tolerance made me assume that it wasn't too bad. I initially ignored the pain and went to my dance classes like usual. I was also trying to make up for my previous absences from when I'd been injured before and so I was taking up to 2 1/2 hours of modern, 3 hours of tap, 2 hours of jazz, and 8 to 10 hours of ballet per week. This was all at the same time that rehearsals for the spring musical - Thoroughly Modern Millie - were starting, for which I was Dance Captain, and playing the parts of Alice, and the understudy for Millie.
The pain kept up so I went back to my ankle specialist who promptly informed me that I would need an MRI, and probably surgery. I was crushed. I had to worry about finishing the musical, then there was the BV choir's trip to New York City, and finally I had been accepted to the Jordan Academy of Dance's summer ballet intensive. The timing was so completely NOT conducive to having surgery.
My MRI indicated that my anterior talofibular ligament (ATFL) was stretched by my injuries to the point where it no longer offered me any stability. So I was scheduled to have surgery on April Fool's Day of 2010. The surgery (called a "modified brostrom" surgery) required three small Xs to be cut in separate parts of my ankle to scope the area, then a larger incision be made on my ankle bone. Then my ATFL would be cut in half and overlapped - both for extra stability and to shorten the ligament. When I woke up from my surgery my ankle specialist/surgeon informed me that my ATFL had actually been detached from my tibia, so they had to take the extra step of reattaching it first. So. Much. Fun. But when I got home from my surgery my bestie Knox came over with chocolate ice cream and wafer cookies and we watched UP and Gilmore Girls.
A week later Visions, Baronettes and Symphonic choir were supposed to leave for New York City. There was no way I was going to miss this trip, so despite my choir director's underhanded attempts to get me to stay home, I went and I had a fabulous time! I got to see The Addams Family Musical which has become one of my all-time favorite Broadway musicals. I got to see Billy Elliot, and even though I didn't get to dance in the choreography workshop with cast members of Billy Elliot, they signed my bright green cast! I also "crutched" the entire span of the Brooklyn Bridge!
Even after I had my surgery I was an idiot. Why? Well, the day I got my cast off and my boot on was the day of show choir auditions. Additionally, I wanted to audition to be Dance Captain, which meant that I had to choreograph 8 eight-counts and teach it to the group in 10 minutes. So I went to the doctor's during school on the day of auditions and got my cast off. My doctor told me not to walk on my leg and to keep using my crutches until I was completely pain free. I crutched out of the doctor's office, threw my crutches in the back of the car, went back to school and did my whole audition on my boot. Not the smartest move I've ever made, but also not the worst -- I got Dance Captain.
After 6 months away from dance, tons of physical therapy, and a switch in dance studios I was back dancing and happier than ever. I've rolled my ankle a couple of times since but never badly, and now I'm always very careful to ice and rest it immediately and for several days after just to be sure.
I was dancing in the studio in my basement, like I do almost everyday when I'm home, so it was absolutely a normal day. I even remember what I was dancing to: Oculus Ex Inferni by Symphony X. I went to do a double attitude jump and as I was coming back down to land it I caught all of my weight on the side of my foot.
 | ||
| Note the sexy blue boot. |
I am an idiot.
Because of that decision I was back doing risky jumps and turns way before I should have. After I had been dancing again for only a few months in March when I supinated my same ankle while walking. At first I thought I had broken my ankle because I heard a super loud cracking sound, but I later learned that ligaments tend to make a loud cracking noise when they tear apart.
That particular injury took a couple of months to heal. For a while I wasn't even sure if I would be able to attend the dance intensive at Ballet Chicago that summer that I had auditioned into. Luckily I felt strong enough several weeks before the 5 week long intensive started and decided to go. (That's how I initially found out about Columbia!) When I came back at the end of the summer I felt stronger than I'd been in months and I was excited to start my junior year.
However, it was apparently inevitable that I would get injured again. That December I was at a show for my best friend's band in Columbus when I was knocked over in a mosh pit. Again I supinated my bad ankle, but rather than get trampled my the mosh pit, I jumped right back up. I could tell I'd hurt my ankle again, but the combination of adrenaline and my heightened pain tolerance made me assume that it wasn't too bad. I initially ignored the pain and went to my dance classes like usual. I was also trying to make up for my previous absences from when I'd been injured before and so I was taking up to 2 1/2 hours of modern, 3 hours of tap, 2 hours of jazz, and 8 to 10 hours of ballet per week. This was all at the same time that rehearsals for the spring musical - Thoroughly Modern Millie - were starting, for which I was Dance Captain, and playing the parts of Alice, and the understudy for Millie.
The pain kept up so I went back to my ankle specialist who promptly informed me that I would need an MRI, and probably surgery. I was crushed. I had to worry about finishing the musical, then there was the BV choir's trip to New York City, and finally I had been accepted to the Jordan Academy of Dance's summer ballet intensive. The timing was so completely NOT conducive to having surgery.
My MRI indicated that my anterior talofibular ligament (ATFL) was stretched by my injuries to the point where it no longer offered me any stability. So I was scheduled to have surgery on April Fool's Day of 2010. The surgery (called a "modified brostrom" surgery) required three small Xs to be cut in separate parts of my ankle to scope the area, then a larger incision be made on my ankle bone. Then my ATFL would be cut in half and overlapped - both for extra stability and to shorten the ligament. When I woke up from my surgery my ankle specialist/surgeon informed me that my ATFL had actually been detached from my tibia, so they had to take the extra step of reattaching it first. So. Much. Fun. But when I got home from my surgery my bestie Knox came over with chocolate ice cream and wafer cookies and we watched UP and Gilmore Girls.
 |
| Rockefeller Center! |
 | |
| At Thespian inductions in my boot. |
Even after I had my surgery I was an idiot. Why? Well, the day I got my cast off and my boot on was the day of show choir auditions. Additionally, I wanted to audition to be Dance Captain, which meant that I had to choreograph 8 eight-counts and teach it to the group in 10 minutes. So I went to the doctor's during school on the day of auditions and got my cast off. My doctor told me not to walk on my leg and to keep using my crutches until I was completely pain free. I crutched out of the doctor's office, threw my crutches in the back of the car, went back to school and did my whole audition on my boot. Not the smartest move I've ever made, but also not the worst -- I got Dance Captain.
After 6 months away from dance, tons of physical therapy, and a switch in dance studios I was back dancing and happier than ever. I've rolled my ankle a couple of times since but never badly, and now I'm always very careful to ice and rest it immediately and for several days after just to be sure.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Three hundred and twenty-three miles away from home
I love it here.
It's really surreal sometimes.
For instance: the study/homework party we had tonight. I was working on a short paper about how competition in different communities (specifically in the dance world) affects the relationships in those communities, as well as a short journal entry of my reactions to today's dancemaking class. My suite-mate Alessa was sketching dress designs, my friend Alison was writing a paper about what has made her "her creative self," and my friend Kacie was writing a three to five page paper about a desk-lamp. Other assignments I've had so far include drawing my skeleton -- not anatomically, but how I picture it in my imagination -- and then some notes about it, writing about an animal whose movement I find interesting, and also just making sure to condition every day.
There's something very different about going to an arts school than there is going to a state school. Maybe it's the excessive number of Toms, combat boots, mohawks, and dreadlocks around me. Maybe it's because Columbia legitimately has a certified zombie-specialist on staff. Maybe it's even just the energy of Chicago, but there really is something different here. I felt it the moment I stepped on campus at the open house last spring, and that's what convinced me that this place is absolutely for me.
That being said, I'm really missing home right now. I've been away for a month and I have two more to go until I can come home for the first time at Thanksgiving. I miss my friends, and I miss the Delaware County Fair, and I miss the smell of fall in the country. I know that last part sounds super cheesy but, my hand to God, fall smells different in the city. Not like fall. Fall is supposed to smell like leaves, and wood-smoke, and chilly air. Here it just smells like chilly air and the subway. Fall is supposed to bring bonfires and marching band season (some call it "football season" but they're missing the whole point of football games: halftime). I'm really sad that I didn't get to see my seniors premiere their halftime show at the BV v. Hayes game (or see the Barons epically beat the Pacers). I won't get to march with my Guardies on Alumni Night, I won't get to see my seniors' Senior Night show, and I won't get to see the fall play. Two of my close friends who graduated with my sister just had a baby yesterday, and I won't get to see them for months.
Facebook and Skype are not enough sometimes.
Don't get me wrong, I really do love it here. So much! But if you're going to an in-state school, please don't take it for granted.
It's really surreal sometimes.
For instance: the study/homework party we had tonight. I was working on a short paper about how competition in different communities (specifically in the dance world) affects the relationships in those communities, as well as a short journal entry of my reactions to today's dancemaking class. My suite-mate Alessa was sketching dress designs, my friend Alison was writing a paper about what has made her "her creative self," and my friend Kacie was writing a three to five page paper about a desk-lamp. Other assignments I've had so far include drawing my skeleton -- not anatomically, but how I picture it in my imagination -- and then some notes about it, writing about an animal whose movement I find interesting, and also just making sure to condition every day.
There's something very different about going to an arts school than there is going to a state school. Maybe it's the excessive number of Toms, combat boots, mohawks, and dreadlocks around me. Maybe it's because Columbia legitimately has a certified zombie-specialist on staff. Maybe it's even just the energy of Chicago, but there really is something different here. I felt it the moment I stepped on campus at the open house last spring, and that's what convinced me that this place is absolutely for me.
That being said, I'm really missing home right now. I've been away for a month and I have two more to go until I can come home for the first time at Thanksgiving. I miss my friends, and I miss the Delaware County Fair, and I miss the smell of fall in the country. I know that last part sounds super cheesy but, my hand to God, fall smells different in the city. Not like fall. Fall is supposed to smell like leaves, and wood-smoke, and chilly air. Here it just smells like chilly air and the subway. Fall is supposed to bring bonfires and marching band season (some call it "football season" but they're missing the whole point of football games: halftime). I'm really sad that I didn't get to see my seniors premiere their halftime show at the BV v. Hayes game (or see the Barons epically beat the Pacers). I won't get to march with my Guardies on Alumni Night, I won't get to see my seniors' Senior Night show, and I won't get to see the fall play. Two of my close friends who graduated with my sister just had a baby yesterday, and I won't get to see them for months.
Facebook and Skype are not enough sometimes.
Don't get me wrong, I really do love it here. So much! But if you're going to an in-state school, please don't take it for granted.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Vintage, Vegans, and (ele)Vators [BEDA August 31]
So after having a really crappy couple of days, today was awesome.
I went thrifting this morning as one of the Weeks Of Welcome events that Columbia hosts. The thing that Columbia apparently didn't think about though was that this is an Arts school. Everyone here loves to thrift. So they were a little taken aback when 200 people showed up for an event prepared for 80 at the most. Luckily, my suite-mates and I were able to get free CTA day-passes (we haven't gotten our U-passes yet which will let us ride all CTA transportation for free) while, unluckily most people there did not.
I got separated from my suite-mates, but the group that I was in went on the blue line to Division and Milwaukee. I got to know some of the people in my group and we checked out a few decent thrift stores there. The real gold at that stop though, was this amazing record store we found called Favorite Records. They have amazing stuff, in great condition, and it's organized AND priced really well. Plus they give a 10% discount to students. *Insert winning here*
After the record store several of us decided to go one more stop down on the blue line to Dameon and check out some vintage shops in that area. A lot of cool, legit vintage stuff, but again the best discovery at that stop was this place called Native Foods Cafe. Native Foods is 100% vegetarian friendly and like 95% vegan-friendly. I know a lot of people don't have a very high opinion of vegetarian food, and even I don't to a certain point. But this place was AMAZING. They have all these burgers and things that, from the way they're described, one would totally think had meat on them. Ex: their bacon cheeseburger. But NONE of their food has meat in it. None. All the "meats" are really meat substitutes, like setian, or tempeh, or tofu. And while they definitely don't taste like beef, who said they have to!? I had a "scorpion burger" with vegan cheese (cheese made with soymilk) and sweet potato fries. Native Foods also has amazing drinks. Of course they have your basic fountain drinks, but they also have Lavender Lemonade (French lavender steeped with fresh lemons. Sweetened with organic sugar), Watermelon Fresca (Fresh watermelon and a touch of mint. Sweetened with organic agave), and their Native Iced Tea (Organic hibiscus and wild berry tea. Sweetened with organic agave.)
So. Fracking. Good.
Later I played Apples to Apples with some new friends. And when that got old, we played elevator pranks. For instance, we got onto and empty elevator and we all just faced the walls. When someone else got onto the elevator, they were super freaked out that everyone was just....standing there....facing the walls. Another favorite was to be really quiet when people got on and then clap and cheer for them when the elevator got to their desired floor.
Yea. Arts students. This is socially acceptable behavior here.
So this is my last post for BEDA!!!!! Blogging Every Day in August is OVER!!! Yay!
I went thrifting this morning as one of the Weeks Of Welcome events that Columbia hosts. The thing that Columbia apparently didn't think about though was that this is an Arts school. Everyone here loves to thrift. So they were a little taken aback when 200 people showed up for an event prepared for 80 at the most. Luckily, my suite-mates and I were able to get free CTA day-passes (we haven't gotten our U-passes yet which will let us ride all CTA transportation for free) while, unluckily most people there did not.
I got separated from my suite-mates, but the group that I was in went on the blue line to Division and Milwaukee. I got to know some of the people in my group and we checked out a few decent thrift stores there. The real gold at that stop though, was this amazing record store we found called Favorite Records. They have amazing stuff, in great condition, and it's organized AND priced really well. Plus they give a 10% discount to students. *Insert winning here*
After the record store several of us decided to go one more stop down on the blue line to Dameon and check out some vintage shops in that area. A lot of cool, legit vintage stuff, but again the best discovery at that stop was this place called Native Foods Cafe. Native Foods is 100% vegetarian friendly and like 95% vegan-friendly. I know a lot of people don't have a very high opinion of vegetarian food, and even I don't to a certain point. But this place was AMAZING. They have all these burgers and things that, from the way they're described, one would totally think had meat on them. Ex: their bacon cheeseburger. But NONE of their food has meat in it. None. All the "meats" are really meat substitutes, like setian, or tempeh, or tofu. And while they definitely don't taste like beef, who said they have to!? I had a "scorpion burger" with vegan cheese (cheese made with soymilk) and sweet potato fries. Native Foods also has amazing drinks. Of course they have your basic fountain drinks, but they also have Lavender Lemonade (French lavender steeped with fresh lemons. Sweetened with organic sugar), Watermelon Fresca (Fresh watermelon and a touch of mint. Sweetened with organic agave), and their Native Iced Tea (Organic hibiscus and wild berry tea. Sweetened with organic agave.)
So. Fracking. Good.
Later I played Apples to Apples with some new friends. And when that got old, we played elevator pranks. For instance, we got onto and empty elevator and we all just faced the walls. When someone else got onto the elevator, they were super freaked out that everyone was just....standing there....facing the walls. Another favorite was to be really quiet when people got on and then clap and cheer for them when the elevator got to their desired floor.
Yea. Arts students. This is socially acceptable behavior here.
So this is my last post for BEDA!!!!! Blogging Every Day in August is OVER!!! Yay!
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