Goats.
Not a terribly scary animal. However there are people in the world who are terrified of goats. Not a big deal.
However sometimes those people are paranoid, and assume that any mention of goats anywhere in the world is a direct frontal assault on them. Especially when those people are stupid, evil, immature, narcissistic, soulless, talentless demons. Then it becomes a big deal. Naomi Campbell level hissy-fits and temper tantrums are thrown. Also, people like that are completely incapable of noticing that every single person around them despises them. No. One. Likes. Them. No one. They are also incapable of noticing when their really dried-out, bleach-damaged hair looks like straw. (Straw with really bad dark brown roots.) Which might be incentive for a goat to attempt to eat said hair.
I have a blue beta fish. His name is Goat.
You know when you watch Criminal Minds or Law and Order or other shows like that, and the plot of the episode almost exactly matches that of crimes that had been in the news around the time it aired. Except they put one of those disclaimers in the credits that says that the episode is absolutely and definitely not based on any real life event or person at all. That way none of it can be used as definitive proof of anything.
*Disclaimer: This blog post is not under any circumstances based on, nor has anything to do with any real person or event. Ever.*
I think goats are absolutely adorable.
Lawls.
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